acquiescence – the reluctant acceptance of something without protest.

Humility is a character quality that looks good on paper but is easily ignored and abused in the real world. This is especially true when humility runs into a proud and controlling person.  I know because by nature I am compliant and one of the kindest and most humble people you will ever meet. See how humble I am? Over the years in my desire for peace, I would often cave into the shoddy arguments of the proud and authoritative manipulation of bad leadership. Probably one of the most used and abused verses aimed at bringing the humble heart to subservience is Romans 12:18. It says,

“If possible, so far as it depends on you, be at peace with all men.”

If possible? In the mind of the humble, it is always possible to be at peace — all you have to do is give in and let the other person have their way.  Have you ever noticed, the proud man never gives in? In his arrogance and conceit, he usually thinks he is right. That is the danger of pride, when you think you are right you rarely give any credence to other people’s arguments and reasons. Or you tell yourself that a person thinks the way they do because they are so far below you that their ideas don’t even deserve to be listened to.

What if the proud person isn’t right? What if he simply is pushing his selfish agenda? What if he is deluded in thinking he is right, but he is way off target?

A major crisis takes place in the mind of the humble, “If I disagree with them then we will not be at peace. And God tells me that I need to do all I can to be at peace. But I don’t agree. Shouldn’t I be willing to take one on the chin for peace? How come they never take one on the chin? And plus they are wrong.”

So then after the humble person rouses up his courage and disagrees, the proud person cries foul. And in their anger from not getting their way they will throw disparaging thoughts and remarks back on you. Let me give you a few examples:

• What if a President presents a health care plan you really believe will bankrupt a country? What if you disagree with him and say that there has to be a better way? In our current political landscape, you will be called a hater, a fool or simply a person that is an obstructionist. Don’t you see, you are wrong? Either you agree (acquiesce) or get dragged through the mud of a ruined reputation.
• What if a proud parent tells their child they must always take their advice on any number of issues?  I once had a dad come into my office who was upset that his 16-year-old daughter put a different color hair dye in her hair when he didn’t want her to. She was forever labeled as a rebel and ungrateful teen. She was the problem and would always be.
• What if a senior pastor doesn’t like the music of a worship pastor, does he have the right to fire him? I have seen it happen often.

What is real peace? That is tough to answer; but I know this, just because there is agreement does not mean there is peace. If a humble person keeps complying against his will and better judgment bitterness will start to take root. Even though he may agree on the outside, inside a storm is brewing. And if you are not careful, it may come spilling out in very public ways.

So if you are one of the few and proud people of humility, learn to stand up on your convictions and go ahead, make your argument. Don’t let the proud convince you that they are right just because they can yell louder or intimidate through name calling. Peace is hard to come by, and remember is never can be reached through the swamp of acquiescence – – you will only be stuck in a never-ending game of control and manipulation.

Stand up for yourself.