I received this request today from someone at our church:

“In all your free time that you have (), can you write a booklet with 10 kind questions and responses to dealing with LGBTQ movement that will give a clear picture to the big G God??!!! I’m so lost with how to approach this whole topic without coming across as a jerk! No deadline necessary.”

I just finished preaching on Sodom and Gomorrah, and I had a feeling I would get some questions and even push-back sent my way. Since I did say the sin of Sodom wasn’t primarily from a lack of hospitality, which some modern progressive scholars often say, that means the next option is that sin of Sodom was notorious for their homosexual behavior. The men of Sodom wanted to have sex with the two angels that looked like men. Therefore, it is reasonable to assume that homosexual behavior is one of the main reasons why God sent judgment.

Now when you say that in a public forum these days, people hear all kind of things: The pastor hates gays, God hates gays, we should all hate gays. Even if you don’t say that, many people think you do. Some may leave and never come back. And others will come to you with follow up questions like the one I posted above.

A little background on the question needs to be given. In the course of my sermon, I made the comment that people see God as either a big “G” God or a small “g” god. A big “G” God is Holy and Pure. He cannot look upon sin, and he does judge sin. A small “g” god is nice. He accepts people as they are, and he only judges those who don’t want to be with him for all eternity. Most people are safe with a small “g” god.

It is often said the small “g” god loves everyone as they are. Nothing is demanded or expected. No life change is required…you are who you are and god is ok with who you are, and he has nothing to say about what you do. The big “G” God, on the other hand, loves everyone in spite of who they are. And the only way to spend eternity with God is you need to be covered by “Christ’s righteousness.” The Bible makes some strong statements about being in Christ:

(1) To be in Christ you must believe Christ died for you. The sins he died for are your sins. God crushed his Son because you sinned.

(2) The Spirit of God lives in you. And when he lives in you he will begin to change your appetites, specifically when it comes to sin. Paul asks, “Should we continue in sin so grace will abound?” Answer, “God Forbid!” No way, Christ died so we no longer have to live in it. (Sin is slavery, not freedom, and Christ set us free)

(3) Homosexuality is considered a sinful action, just as adultery is, murder is, and fornication (which is having sex outside of marriage). If you see God as a big “G” you will want to please him and stop sinning. Jesus said to the adulterous woman, “Go and sin no more.” If god is a small “g” go do what you want.

So with that in mind, the next part of the question can now be answered. If you see god as a small “g’ god you don’t care what I have to say next because you are used to justifying everything. During my sermon, I said that if I was on the Ellen show and she asked me if homosexuality was a sin, I wouldn’t answer right away because I would first need to know how she saw God. If God was to her a small “g” god we have no common ground to talk and everything I say at that point will make me out to be a mean old ogre.

But if God is a big “G” God then we can talk. So here are 10 questions:

(1) Why is homosexuality wrong? Because the big “G” God designed a world to operate a certain way. His design is meant for optimal joy, and marriage, as he designed it, is between a man and a woman. It is a sacred union, not to be messed with or touched. We may think we can do things outside his design, but it ALWAYS causes corrosion to the design.

(2) Does God hate gays? According to the Bible, homosexuality is not an identity it is an action. God does not hate people, he loves them.

(3) If God loves people, why does he judge homosexuality? Because sin always destroys. We have convinced ourselves that homosexuality is good, healthy and normal. But honestly, it is not. If you were to actually do a study, the vast majority of homosexual behavior is destructive. You will never hear that, but talk to a homosexual and ask them, “Are you truly satisfied or are you trying to convince the world you are?” I know people will say that that last question is judgmental. But here is what I have found over working as a pastor for 20 years, SIN NEVER SATISFIES.

(4) Why can’t you let people just live as they want? I do. But if they are going to be “In Christ” they are now identified in him. He does have standards, the Bible says “we must walk worthy of the gospel.” You cannot live in a state of confirmed sin. We all sin, but Christians who are in Christ, will wrestle and fight against being confirmed. They will not give up and say they can’t change.

(5) Don’t I have compassion on the person who has same-sex attraction? Absolutely! But that same-sex attraction should not be given a special exemption over other forms of lust. I once was talking to a homosexual man who said, “You have no idea how hard it is not to act out on your passions.” I looked at him and said, “Sure I do. I find that I am attracted to women, however, since I am in Christ I choose to stay loyal to my wife. And when I was single I chose to stay celibate until I got married. There is no special sanction for a person who has same-sex attraction.”

(6) Isn’t it cruel for churches to administer conversion therapy? There is no such thing as conversion therapy, it is called regeneration. (See Titus 3:1-5). If God cannot change my sinful appetites then I do not believe in his converting power, and I deny the power of the gospel.

(7) Can a gay man attend your church? Yes, everyone is given time to hear and accept the gospel.

(8) Can you be friends with a gay man or woman? Yes, of course.

(9) What if your child is gay? Love them, talk with them, but don’t agree just to have peace. Remember, according to the Bible, there is no such thing as gayness, there is same-sex attraction, but being identified by your sin is not consistent with God’s design. He made marriage for a man and a woman. People do not identify with murder or rape. They both are actions.

(10) Is there any hope for someone caught in same-sex attraction? There is hope for everyone who ever sinned.

So, I know that will not fix anything. I know I will be seen as a hater, whatever that means. And I know people will twist scripture to say homosexuality can have a monogamous form that is healthy. As a pastor, I have an obligation to say that isn’t true, regardless of what society says. I believe in a big “G” God, and his ways are always above mine even if I don’t understand them. To agree just to agree may be detrimental for the person who is dying to hear the truth.

If a person has cancer, a doctor has an obligation to tell him even though he won’t be liked.